My Search

I am in class multitasking, I decided to take a class about web page design. As I am sitting here, learning about web page design. I am looking for a new job. A new job, it feels like I have been unemployed forever. I cant stand it. I hate talking about it. I feel like a loser for not having a job. Truth be told I know that its not my fault. There was a reduction in force and my contract was not renewed. I know that, I tell myself that everyday. Reality hit when I received my last paycheck. I have always worked since I was 14 (Yeah DC Summerworks!), my pride holds me back to ask for help. It was demeaning to file for unemployment. Ugh!!! And to think there are some people who live off unemployment. I can see how that is possible. It is going to take 3 checks just for me to pay my house note. I wonder who decided how much unemployment you get. Better yet who designed the system, I understand that one is not tom ake a living off of it, but dang I cant even live with what they are giving me.

So now Im on my search, I am searching for a new job in any shape, form or fashion. So far finding jobs that appeal to me has been great. What is frustrating is that, I have not received any calls. I feel that I am qualified to do pretty much anything. I am a fast learner, but I just cant stop thinking about how many others applied for the same job.

Can say that it has been interesting, last week I went to a job fair and saw so many donts. And to think that my mother and I was having a discussion about me wearing pants and not a skirt.

1. Please dont look like you just came from the club. I saw so many females that was wearing too tight, too low cut clothing.
2. Keep your hair neat. Just because your hair is natural doesnt mean that it has to be a mess. Props goes out the the lady with the black power afro. It demanded attention and it wasnt messy. Have your hair cut, pulled back neat, something
3. Men - Dont wear a baseball cap, comb your hair
4. Hide your tattoos, come on you are looking for a job. You want to be remembered for your qualifications .
5. Which brings me to this, if you have tattoos or thinking about getting one (I have 5), get them in places that can be covered up easily.
6. Dress professionally, wearing your favorite t-shirt and jeans may not get you the job

Through out the job fair there were so many people in violation of the basics, I wanted to pull them to the side and slap them with a fine.
What will boil my blood, they will get a job before me

my fear

Fear
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us.We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be?You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.We are born to make manifest the Glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we subconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
Marianne Williamson

Early work

I have been cleaning and purging...I found some poems that I wrote sooo looonnng ago...Here they are

You Love Me

When you say that you love me

Do you mean it, well see

Will you go to the highest mountian

Go to the lowest point of the sea

When you say that you love me

Is it just for me

When you say that you love me

Do you know what that means

In three words can you tell me

Is one talking about me

When you say that you love me

I know what it means

And I know that I love you

Is the strongest feeling for me

When you left me

Did you know when you left me

You broke my heart in two

Did you know that when you left me

There was noone who could replace you

Did you know that when you left me

You turned my world around

Did you know that when you left me

My feelings went upside down

Did you know that when you was there

I could hope for the better

Did you know that when you was there

I wanted to love you forever